My uncle owns a top-notch, busy little Italian eatery in Seapoint, Cape Town. It overlooks a petrol station and a main road. It has a few tables outside on the wonky paving which are perfectly suited to enjoying a glass of wine and arguing about whatever drives past.
It’s not the greatest location, the interior isn’t stunning and the waitresses aren’t supermodels but the food is remarkable and keeps a dedicated clientele coming back for more year after year. People don’t need my uncle’s pizza, but as is apparent, they certainly want it.
At this point I should probably mention that my uncle is a blind-faith BMW man. Bayerische Motoren-Werke can do no wrong. He has owned many Beemers over the years and currently makes do with a first generation V8 X5 and a classic E46 328i convertible. I also own an old Beemer, but my job as a motoring scribe has introduced me to a myriad of machines which help put everything in perspective. So suffice it to say that when the topic of the X6 comes up, things get heated, wine is consumed with greater vigour and family ties are threatened.
And this is why: I think the X6 is hideous. Sure it’s muscular and menacing and literally frightens people into the middle lane, but I’m sorry, if you want a pretty car, phone that brand with four rings. I don’t want to get down to specifics but I think it’s the rear that gets me; it looks like a Japanese teenager’s running shoe.
Climbing inside however is a wonderful thing. Firstly, you don’t have to look at it anymore and secondly it is first-class BMW in there. The car shrinks around you in that special way that BMW X cars manage to and the steering wheel is just the right thickness. The comparatively low seating position and the muscular nature of the thing bumps up your heart rate just slightly, even before you turn it on. It’s that kind of car.
BMW X6 Interior
As the twin-turbocharged inline-6 kicks over, a shrill, mechanical rasp fills the air until the engine warms up and settles down. Throttle response is lively – you are after all prodding the two-time world engine of the year.
Of course in this modern age of vehicle design the car is a pleasure at low speeds, gentle as an angry but recently subdued circus elephant, and attracting just as much attention.
Once the road clears up in front of you though the X6 becomes another animal entirely. Good God this thing is good round corners. Hammer the throttle, click up the gears using the flappy paddles and watch the needles race endlessly clockwise. Corner coming, drop a few gears, ease on the anchors, throw it in like a hatchback and nail the throttle just after the apex. This thing is epic in the twisties: flat, composed; so utterly planted as to almost be worrying. Especially to people who own decent sports cars.
How have they done this?
Well it’s all down to something called DPC – Dynamic Performance Control. In a nutshell, power goes to the rear diff – business as usual. Then on each side shaft is a set of gears and a clutch. When the car feels that you’re being an arse or that it needs more traction, it actively speeds up the necessary rear wheel. Think of it like a tank: if you want to turn left, speed up the right side and vice versa.
It’s all much more complicated than that I’m sure but forget about the mechanisms – its not important unless you’re German. What is important is how this translates through the seat to your backside and the steering wheel to your sweaty palms.
Quite simply, you turn the steering wheel less, the car is infinitely more capable than it should be and if any of your mates own a Porsche Cayman you can phone them, pull out your tongue and make rude noises.
Back to the engine, and I feel this is important, if you can hold on till next year, wait for the twin-turbo V8. The inline-6 is very good but it’s a bit loud at high revs and it does feel the weight of the car. This is the kind of car which needs, and wants, a lot more power.
Right, so, in summary, BMW have produced a 4-seater Coupe with 4 doors which handles like a sports car. No wait, that’s not right. BMW have produced a 4×4 with high ground clearance which looks like a Coupe but handles like a sportscar. No, that’s not it. BMW have given the world a high end sportscar which looks like a 4×4 but is shaped like a coupe but has the added practicality of four doors and a boot.
This could take a while.
Bottom line: you don’t need a car like this, you want one. Just like I don’t need another pizza right now…
Prices and specifications for the BMW X6 in South Africa
Model: BMW Xdrive35i
Price: R654 000
Engine: Inline-6, 3.0 litre
Power: 225kW at 5800rpm
Torque: 400Nm at 1300rpm (holy s#!t)
Accleration: 0 – 100km/h in 6.7 seconds
Top Speed: 240km/h
Fuel Consumption: 12.1 litres/100km (combined EU cycle)
CO2: 286g/km
Model: BMW Xdrive35d
Price: R724 000
Engine: Inline-6, 3.0 litre VVT diesel
Power: 210kW at 4000rpm
Torque: 580 Nm at 1750 – 2250rpm
Accleration: 0 – 100km/h in 6.9 seconds
Top Speed: 236km/h
Fuel Consumption: 9 litres/100km (cobined EU cycle)
CO2: 237g/km
Tags: active diff, bmw, pizza, twin-turbo, ugly, v8, x6
