I am very upset I’m not a billionaire right now. Because this is the sort of art I’d spend my money on. A truly unique piece of motorsport history, a Toleman TG184-2 Formula One car driven by Ayrton Senna in his debut F1 season, is up for auction at The Spring Sale to be hosted by Silverstone Auctions on 16^th May.

This particular car has become almost mythical and is perhaps best known for Senna’s remarkable second place drive in the rain-soaked 1984 Monaco GP, arguably the race which first demonstrated his extraordinary talents to the world. The Toleman, which Senna also raced to 3^rd in the British and 7^th in the Canadian Grand Prix’s, has been in private ownership for the past 16 years.

If I owned this car I think I’d cherish it like I would my own children. Here’s the video of why this car is so special. One more picture after the jump.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ke92NqanQJs

This admittedly dramatic sounding incident occured at the Friday free practice at the Malaysia GP. Sorry about the terribly music, I searched long and hard through down the corridors of YouTube for a version which hadn’t been dubbed over with shit music. But I couldn’t find one. So I went with the best quality footage.

I have contacted him directly to apologise for getting so personal, which he responded to with “No worries,” etc. I don’t hate the guy, I mean I don’t know him personally so how could I. I still think he was way offsides and I do think his F1 preview show could improve drastically. Anyway, in the interests of transparency, I’ve not deleted the letter, but you’ll have to click Read More to see it.

Sasha, as avid Formula One fans, we have put up with your ham-fisted sports broadcasting for far too long, and now you have quite deliberately poked us with a stick. For somebody who professes to love Formula One so much, and possess boundless and intimate knowledge of what is an iconic sport, to prank South African’s about the race coming to Kyalami is way, way offsides.

Yes, I realise that today is the 1st of April. But to my mind this is inexcusable.

Your little publicity stunt has left a sour taste in the mouths of everyone who is even remotely interested in the sport. Did you see the Capetonians clambering all over the shoddy roof at Killarney, sitting in traffic in 35 degree heat just to get a glimpse of a young Swiss guy driving up and down in the Red Bull car? Did you see the tens of thousands of people drudging through Johannesburg’s pouring rain at Kyalami to attend the Top Gear Festival, just to witness first hand our only South African champion driving around that incredible racetrack? Or were you too busy boring Jeremy Clarkson to death in the VIP area with your one-liners about the Teletubbies?

And the joke you decide to go with on April Fools is that an actual Formula One race weekend is coming to our country. But that wasn’t enough for you, you had to keep adding fuel to the fire, stating imaginary ticket prices and quoting the “FAI” – yes, Sasha, nobody noticed that it’s actually the FIA. And tweeting your sarky URL “www.igotcaughtbysashasaprilfoolsscam.com” just rubs salt in.

These are the people you have fooled, these are the people you broadcast to every race Sunday, presenting yourself as our ambassador to the sport. I was personally besides myself with excitement, as I imagine every true Formula One fan was, especially after reading that Sebastian Vettel said he would add Kyalami to the calendar. And do you know why I was excited? Because I trusted that you, the Formula One Guy, wouldn’t be so cruel as to prank us like that.

And all this for what? For more retweets on Twitter? For more followers? For more listeners to your vanilla radio show?

I sincerely hope that this cheap self-promoting exercise backfires, and your reputation as South Africa’s “leading” Formula One broadcaster suffers.

Ciro De Siena

The long-anticipated Ayrton Senna documentary/movie is due to hit UK screens in Summer, and we’ve got the preview. The trailer alone gave me goosebumps; the movie is probably going to reduce me to a quivering wreck.

Preview and a handpicked selection of magnificent Senna videos after the jump

The Preview:

Firstly, what must rank as one of the greatest displays of brilliance in motorsport, Senna makes up five places in under 40 seconds, at Donington Raceway. In the wet.

In a recent film made by Jeremy Clarkson for season 15 of Top Gear, which will air on local telly soon, Clarkson asked just about every great driver the sport has known, on camera, who they thought the greatest driver of all time. Everyone, including Michael Schumacher, answered: Ayrton Senna.

Any footage of Senna behind the wheel of a racing car will immediately show his talent. His car control was almost unnatural, while his ability to consistently drive on the very limit and overtake where no one thought overtaking was possible made him incredibly exciting to watch. In this onboard clip from Suzuka, he enters a corner at 296km/h and nails the follow-through without braking at all.

He was ruthless, but in a paradoxical way. In the 1990 World Championship, Senna lead Ferrari’s Alain Prost going into the penultimate round at Suzuka. If Prost failed to finish, Senna would have the championship wrapped up. Senna was on pole with Prost in second. Off the start, Prost got a better start and Senna simply drove into him in the first corner at 270km/h, destroying both cars. Senna had won, but his reputation had suffered enormously. Murray Walker nearly has a stroke in the commentary box.

And yet in a remarkable display of compassion, during the Belgian race of 1992, friend and competitor Erik Comas crashed violently, knocking himself unconscious. Many drivers drove past the wreck but Senna stopped his car on the track, ending his race. He ran over to the wreck and paramedics arrived shortly thereafter. Comas was unhurt, and Senna’s admirers finally had proof of the other side of his personality.

We’ll keep you posted on release dates for SA.

This weekend, the classic Formula 1 Circuit Kyalami played host to the biggest private motoring event quite possibly in the world. The globally massive Top Gear rolled into town with a veritable barrage of petrol-burning stunts, displays and entertainment. Red Bull Racing flew Sebastian Vettel’s championship winning car, along with David Coulthard, to bring Formula One back to Kyalami for the first time since 1993.

Jodi Scheckter, South Africa’s only Formula One world champion, shipped his 1979 championship winning Ferrari along with three other iconic racing cars to the track for a quick blast, Nick Mason, the drummer of Pink Floyd, flew down to SA with his tasty little McLaren F1, which is worth more than Equatorial Guinea. Almost. Eddie Jordan, former Jordan F1 team boss and all round lunatic swore a bit and Sir Stirling Moss OBE signed some hats. It was epic.

And so were the Johannesburg thundershowers, which arrived like clockwork to cock up the whole goddamn weekend. Clarkson, Hammond and May were barely five minutes into their performance for 10 000 eager fans when the mother of all rain showers flooded the theatre. After laughing hysterically at each other, Clarkson announced: “Can I just say that this is absolutely fucking horrible”, to which Hammond added “I think if we don’t stop I’m going to drown”.

And that was that. I then sprinted back to the Red Bull garage where I was due to interview David Coulthard for 10 minutes, of which I was allowed about four before being told to ask my last question. For the occasion Red Bull had provided a lovely lounge full of 1000 people getting hammered at the free bar and a sound system pumping out the latest Café Del fucking Mar. What I’m trying to say is the video I shot is incomprehensible but I’ve done my best anyway.

The entire rain-soaked trip was worth it to a) have a drink with Coulthard and b) hear a modern F1 car screaming just metres away from me. That noise is unlike anything on earth; it crawls under your skin and beats your eardrums into panic mode. It’s just wonderful. Coulthard only managed a few minutes out there (the car was set up for dry runs) and unfortunately threw in the towel because it was simply too dangerous. He did execute some very loud donuts right in front of me, and the footage is all included.

Lovely stuff.

Red Bull has given rise to what is possibly my favourite photographs of 2010. F1′s very own benevolent dictator, Bernie Ecclestone, turned 80 last week and yet shows absolutely no signs of slowing down/giving up. To mark the occasion, Red Bull Racing presented the maltese poodle of magnates with a custom zimmer frame.

Apparently Ecclestone accepted the gift in good humour, just before the Korean Grand Prix, which we imagine wasn’t nearly as fun, as one of Ecclestone’s adversaries, God, played havoc with the weather.

The zimmer frame has two can holders, a mock Red Bull front wing, and a mock F1 steering wheel, which reportedly has buttons for Viagra, nurse, Power, lawyer, accountant and his assistant Pasquale Lattuneddu.

Hat tip, gentlemen.

Ciro De Siena
Images  © Sutton Images

The F1 circus tent is currently pitched just outside of Budapest for the Hungaroring Grand Prix, or the FORMULA 1 ENI MAGYAR NAGYDIJ 2010, to give it’s official title. Unsurprisingly the Red Bull’s of Sebastien Vettel and Mark Webber continue to dominate, with Vettel putting in a scorching Q3 lap to claim pole position, his seventh of the season. He was over half a second quicker than his Australian team mate and a good 1.2 seconds faster than third-placed Fernando “this is ridiculous” Alonso in the Ferrari. Full results when you click “Read more” below. There may be a bonus video in this for you as well.

The pace of the Red Bulls is simply laughable. Which is exactly what Hamilton and Button are doing about it. Hamilton, who occupies fifth on the grid was quoted as saying: ”It was really my target to finish fifth. I know that the Red Bulls are impossible to beat. It’s a second in the middle sector and half a second in the final sector. For Jenson and me, we just look at the onboard footage and laugh. I don’t know what they’re doing, but it’s incredible. I pulled every inch out of the car. We’ve got to work hard but it’s a good position for us to start and we’re on the clean side. Finishing third or fourth would be spectacular.”

Goodness me Lewis, where’s that British pluck? It must be awfully demoralizing being anybody but Red Bull right now. How a Thai energy drink, marketed by an Austrian genius, ever came to dominate the top sporting code of world motorsport, we’ll never know. Old man Enzo must be choking on his ethereal Chianti.

Michael Schumacher managed 14th while his team mate Nico Rosberg is all the way up in sixth. What’s that Michael? Your car’s not fast enough? Uh, no one really cares any more mate. Sorry.

As usual, Gav and I will be recovering from Saturday evening’s usual festivities and watching the race in our now customary Motorsport Sundays. I might even persuade him into throwing a few words on the interweb after the race. By the way, there is some cool coverage here, here and here.

Qualifying results: Formula One Hungaroring Grand Prix, 31 July 2010

1. Vettel -- Red Bull -- good time
2. Webber -- Red Bull -- slightly worse
3. Alonso -- Ferrari -- over a second slower than Vettel
4. Massa -- Ferrari -- slower than Alonso
5. Hamilton -- McLaren -- slower, but laughing about it
6. Rosberg -- Mercedes GP -- significantly ahead of Schumacher
7. Petrov -- Renault -- nice work
8. Kubica -- Renault -- go on lad
9. De la Rosa -- BMW Sauber Ferrari -- any day now, Pedro
10. Hulkenberg -- Williams-Cosworth -- Stephen Hawkings will be pleased
11. Button -- McLaren -- probably not too worried
12. Barichello -- Williams-Cosworth -- just there for the chicks anyway
13. Sutil -- Force India -- no comment
14. Schumacher -- Mercedes GP -- oh dear
15. Buemi -- Torro Rosso -- best team name ever
16. Liuzzi -- Force India -- probably doesn’t struggle with the pit ladies
17. Alguersuari -- Torro Rosso -- stop day dreaming kid
18. Glock -- Virgin -- probably isn’t one
19. Kovalainen --  Lotus -- uh…
20. Trulli -- Lotus -- is this guy still racing?
21. di Grassi -- Virgin -- same applies
22. Senna -- Hispania Racing -- he’s back
23. Kobayashi -- BMW Sauber Ferrari -- sent to the back for failing to weigh his car
24. Yamamoto -- Hispania -- somebody’s gotta be here.

Bonus video! It’s Gerhard Berger’s first lap of the 1991 Hungary Grand Prix, with Japanese commentary!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=uIwNO6TcN4E

Ciro De Siena

Following the successful hosting of the FIFA World Cup in South Africa, the nation is chasing other major sport events with renewed vigour, and Formula One is no exception.

Over the weekend, F1 supremo Bernie Ecclestone reaffirmed his belief that Formula One will come to the African continent this decade, and the leading city is Cape Town. Eccelstone told BBC radio that “We’ve been talking to the people in Cape Town…We’re talking about building a circuit. It’s probably about three years away. That’s what I would like to see. I would hope so. I’ve been hoping that for five years.”

South Africa enjoyed a healthy dose of Formula One from the inception of the sport. Cape Town was the first city to host an international Formula One Grand Prix in 1960 at the Killarney Race Circuit. The following year the saw the likes of Sterling Moss compete at the same facility but poor financial planning by the promoters lost the event for the venue.

The last time a Formula One race was held in South Africa was in 1993, at the Kyalami circuit in Midrand, north of Johannesburg. Kyalami also held a race in 1992, and from 1967 through to 1985. Prior to that, the Prince George Circuit in East London held events in 1962, ’63 and ’65.

The financial benefits are seemingly obvious; Formula One is the single most expensive sporting code per event on Earth, and returns to each track year after year. Mega-events like the Olympics come along once every few decades and place considerable strain on a city’s finances. It has been suggested that Athens 2004 played a considerable role in the Greek financial crisis which struck only this year.

The news spread rapidly and inevitably Dave Gant, CEO of the South African Grand Prix Corporation, was asked to clarify or even ratify the statements.

Gant has spent the better part of the last decade working to bring Formula One to Africa, and in particular, Cape Town. He has spoken to Ecclestone a number of times on the potential of adding Cape Town to the F1 calendar. Plans for a racetrack facility near the airport were in advanced stages about three years ago but were squashed by the former cabinet of the Western Cape, who backtracked after formally getting behind the project.

Speaking to 567 Cape Talk’s John Maytham late yesterday afternoon, Gant confirmed that the project is very much still alive. “The focus has now moved to a multi-purpose facility, which will include a racetrack as well as industrial and wider business opportunities, with a particular focus on socio-economic upliftment for the area concerned.”

This was the proposed facility near the Cape Town airport.

While he was unable to elaborate further due to sensitivities with the ongoing negotiations, he did detail the financial difficulties of staging a Formula One event: “While the event represents a huge earning opportunity, the license fees and the cost of promoting it mean the facility has to be cross-subsidised.”

This is one of the reservations he has against a street circuit in Cape Town. “While I agree that a street circuit in the Mother City would rival the very best, even Monte Carlo, for beauty and spectacle, it remains a romantic idea which I think is not financialy viable. There is no way for the promoter to capture the crowd, something which Durban learnt the hard way [after staging the A1 Grand Prix].”

Ecclestone has made a direct contribution to developing motorsport in South Africa, through his involvement with the South African Kart Racing Academy, SAKRA, a Section 21 charity training youngsters from all backgrounds for a possible career in motorsport, with the ultimate aim of having a South African in a Formula One car in the near future.

Gant feels strongly about the growing the culture of motorsport in SA, and in that sense, by staging a street race, there is no way to leave a legacy behind once the Formula One roadshow packs up at the end of the race weekend. A purpose built facility has the potential to become a foundation for all motorsport.

While Ecclestone mentioned 2013 as a possible date, Gant believes 2015 is more likely: “I feel it is inevitable that Formula One will come to South Africa, most likely in the next five years, and most likely to Cape Town. I don’t think it will be a street race, but rather at a purpose built facility, of which I hope to reveal details soon.”

Ciro De Siena

Formula One can be ridiculous at times. Honestly, it’s like a petrol-burning version of Bold and the Beautiful. Obviously feeling a little out of the spotlight, Alonso has gone and announced that his thumbs are insured, to the tune of £9 million.

In a statement that could be straight out of The Onion, a Santander spokesman said: “Alonso’s thumbs are a big symbol as, apart from being essential when driving a Formula One car, they represent a sign of victory and that everything is under control and well protected.”

We couldn’t make this stuff up if we tried. So what have we learnt here? Firstly, one requires opposable thumbs to pilot a 900 horsepower racecar. Well, probably. And secondly, Alonso’s chief concern, should he lose one of his precious digits, is not being able to display his happiness after winning a race.

Ciro De Siena

Wooo-hooo! You should have been here last year!

I’m sorry, but is the world suffering from a collective bout of amnesia?  ”The Bahrain Grand Prix was boring” they wailed. “It wasn’t exciting” they cried, gnashing their teeth. Boring you say. Boring? Well, fucking news flash, Formula 1 is boring.

It’s in its nature.  They built that city on boredom. Engineering a car to win is boring. Windtunnels are boring. Ecclestone’s billionaire wardrobe’s boring. Press conferences are boring. Modern circuits are boring. Simulating Nazi prison camp sex acts in a bordello’s dungeon is kind of exciting, but initiated by a boring man.

Tall sex. Boring.

It’s as if everyone suddenly  thought that every season that had gone before was this chaotic smash and grab demolition derby of last gasp winners and race long position swapping. This isn’t Moto GP people. We’re way more sophisticated than that. F1 is like hip-hop without the rhymes. At least in modern times.

There’s this “scarlet-tinted-glasses” view regarding seasons of yore which fucks me right off.  I’ve been watching F1 since I was about 5 and remember about 6 brilliant races in that time. One of which was Rene Arnoux finishing a credible 5th in the Ligier at a rain-soaked Montreal in 1989 which says more about my 11 year old state of mind than the race.

I exaggerate to make a point obviously.  I am hopelessly addicted to the sport and stayed out until 3:20a.m this morning just to watch the free practice session in Melbourne.  It is this barmy fanaticism that drives the sport, and keeps us flocking to processions.  I get really irate when people talk about the good old days of Prost and Senna. What was so bloody good about them?

The 1988 season was like watching 36 hours of Formula 1.  It was beyond boring as the bloody McLaren’s perenially lapped just about everyone and finished 1-2 in every race except fittingly at Monza where the Ferraris came in the top two.  After the McLarens blew up.  It wasn’t even a good fight up front. The McLaren on pole, be it Prost or Senna’s, would usually go on to win and when they did try and overtake each other it ended in tears and heavy fines in Suzuka.  The 3rd place car was probably 3 laps behind and driven by a Belgian.  Boring.  The most exciting thing that happened in the 80s in F1 was me waking Riccardo Patrese up in the Kylami pits from a couch slumber .  Bloody Italians. Ciro’s still on mine as I type.

And don’t get me started on the Schumacher era. That was like watching porn on the radio.  His interminably “effective” drives to 7 World Titles were stifling.  No wonder F1 has to cook up a soap opera every few weeks.  It’s like the WWE, the on track fighting doesn’t feel real but the schlock drama behind it has a trashy allure.

Now every great race I have ever seen (and there’s been about a hundred more than 6) have a few factors in common.  Rain, a classic circuit or a street circuit or a combination of the three. It’s simple.  Don’t give me another Herman Tilke circuit.  Who the fuck is he anyway and why is he the only guy with AutoCad that people approach when they want to bring racing to their shores?

When I was 7 I designed more exciting circuits replete with ludicrous flyovers and tunnels under the sea. With dragons.  Which brings me nicely to my next point. A spot of danger.  If you make a mistake you should be punished.  You shouldn’t be able to afford to be a wanker in F1, to paraphrase Derek Warwick.  Tilke circuits have longer runs offs than the pitlane.  Where’s the fun in that? Give me the “Wall Of Champions” in Montreal anyday.  Or Mirabeau.

We should roll Herman Tilke down there in a barrel. Of piss.

If Tilke designed Eau Rouge sweeping into the Parabolica he’d manage to make it boring.  Perhaps he’s in the right sport after all.

Enjoy the race everyone! I know I will, whatever happens.

For anyone who’s interested this would be my official calendar in no particular order.

1. Adelaide or Melbourne (AUS)

2. Suzuka (JAP)

3. Original Hockenheim (GER)

4. Silverstone (ENG)

5. Interlagos(BRA)

6. Monte Carlo (MON)

7. Bathurst (AUS)

8. Oesterreichring (AUT)

9. Monza (ITA)

10. Singapore (SIN)

11. Brands Hatch (ENG)

12 Spa-Francorchamps (BEL)

13. Laguna Seca (USA)

14. Montreal (CAN)

15. Valencia (SPA)

16 YAS Marina (With less run off) (UAE)

17. Le Mans (Original Circuit) (FRA)

18. Cape Town Street Circuit (I have 2 designed) (RSA)

19. Tokyo Street Circuit. At night. (JAP)

20. The Bahamas would be nice.

- Gavin Williams