A few weeks back I had a bit of a rant about the typo on soon to be shite Campos F1′s website. I prattled on about all the intimate details that need to be considered in order to triumph in the high-tech world of Formula 1. Boy was I wrong. It seems success is a far simpler task. Read on…
Secrets Of F1 Success Revealed.
Wednesday, February 24th, 2010
Driving God Spotlight: Gilles Villeneuve
Thursday, February 18th, 2010
Traction control se ma se p@#s.
All in all it was a great day for Frenchy. They must have spilled their Pernod and flicked their Gitanes Filters defiantly at passersby as Jean-Pierre Jabouille (a driver as French as shrugging at Americans) won the French Grand Prix at Dijon-Prenois in a French car (a Renault) on French tyres (Michelin) and powered by a French fuel manufacturer. Unfortunately due to archaic alcohol laws in France, ironically it’s the only race where you aren’t allowed to spray Champagne.
Video, more pictures and full explanation after the jump: (more…)
Campos Meta Unveils “Type-O” On Website
Thursday, January 28th, 2010
A fool and his money are soon giving press conferences.
Last season was one of the closest in terms of actual times seperating the cars on track. Pole position to the last slot on the grid was usually settled by just over a second. And then for whatever reason the big guns started leaving. Honda, BMW and then Toyota used words like “corporate re-alignment”, “brand re-focus” and “we’re just plain shite” as exit strategies.
Cue Terrible Bread Puns. It’s Bertrand Baguette.
Thursday, November 12th, 2009Hot off the wires is that Renault is handing a test drive to young French Formula 3.5 Champion, Bertrand Baguette. So that’s what the crisis meeting in Paris was all about, whether the French car manufacturer could suffer another blow to it’s image by having such a ridiculous surname adorning its cars.
Baguette. Pasty.
I’ll get us started then.
Let’s hope Baguette doesn’t roll.
Baguette. A cut above the rest. (Yawn, get used to seeing that one in SA car publications)
Why wouldn’t you let your daughter date Baguette? He’s only fresh until you leave the parking lot.
F1 Shocker: Ferrari Says Something True
Thursday, November 5th, 2009Ferrari has long loathed privateer upstarts. The old man himself, Enzo Ferrari, famously referred to the British teams as garagista -garage owners. Now, although I’m not particularly a fan of theirs, Ferrari has it absolutely right.
Check it out by clicking this word. Or this one.
Car companies can’t handle rejection either as Toyota quits F1
Thursday, November 5th, 2009Just two weeks ago Toyota offered Raikkonen oodles of cash to put Panasonic on his chest and race for the slightly red and white. Today, Toyota quits F1. Coincidence?
That's what he thought of your offer, Toyota.
This morning’s headline came as a bit of a shock to me. We all knew that the Japanese car industry was in trouble when giants Honda pulled out of F1 and Subaru pulled out of WRC. Colin Mcrae must have 360′d in his resting place.
eF-One: The Napoleonic Wars.
Thursday, October 29th, 2009Jean Todt has just been elected President of the FIA. He’s the first Frenchy in charge since the often hated Jean-Marie Balestre’s senile reign ended over 15 years ago. One thing’s for sure, Todt’s private life couldn’t be more bizarre than Max Mosley’s extra-curricular activities even if he enjoyed collecting goat’s hoofs and claimed to be the Emperor of Neptune.
It also seems every FIA president needs to have some sort of connection to Hitler. Mosley’s dad -as head of the British Fascist Party- had the Fuhrer at his wedding no doubt boring people round the punch bowl and doing an embarrassing jitterbug once the schnapps started flowing. Balestre joined the French SS during the war and later claimed (obviously) that he was a spy for the good guys all along. Yes. So let’s hope Jean Todt doesn’t prove to have an Aunt who financed the Napoleonic wars or invented the U-Boat.
eF-One: You Only Sing When You’re Winning
Friday, October 23rd, 2009No-one likes a bad loser, but the Brits seem to have a wonderful knack of being bad winners. And bad losers. Y’know, because they always lose at stuff. I have maintained for many years now England will never win another FIFA World Cup™ because they’re all atheists. “God is a Brazilian” after all, but not when it comes to F1 it seems. Poor Rubens Barrichello. It’s like his house always burns down when he has a braai in his own backyard.
Button. Probably supports Chelsea.
But I guess we should grudgingly give Jenson Button some measure of kudos for wrapping up the world title. However it spoke volumes for me about the man’s character when he was stuck behind Kamui Kobayashi for lap after excruciating lap. Button got on the team radio and complained about Kobayashi weaving and blocking him. Please. It was his Grand Prix debut and as a World Champion elect it’s your job to get past him. Kobayashi drove defensively and legally, although his honour was called into question later on when he swerved dangerously in front of Kazuki Nakajima sending him on a murder ride into the barriers.
We think you’ll like it here: Alonso joins Scuderia Familia
Wednesday, September 30th, 2009
Ron Dennis is a weirdo. Not since Howard Hughes locked himself in a hotel room with jars of urine and wore tissue boxes as shoes have we seen anyone display such an aversion to germ-carrying scruffiness. His level of Second-World-War-matron-at-a-Catholic-hospital idea of cleanliness even extended to not allowing employees at McLaren to have any personal effects on their desks. Not even pictures of their families.
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Where’s everybody going? Renault left to clean up as Alonso packs for Ferrari
Tuesday, September 29th, 2009
Oh dear. It hasn’t been an easy couple of weeks for Renault. After title sponsors ING and Mutua Federale peeled their stickers off the side of the car, the BBC is reporting that Ferrari are set to announce Fernando Alonso’s signing with the Italian team. Alonso is to race alongside the injured Felipe Massa in 2010, replacing Kimi Raikonnen who is tipped to move to McLaren. In the ensuing driver shuffle, Robert Kubica is expected to replace Alonso at Renault. Crikey, if only the on-track antics of the sport were this exciting.
